Day 14:

In a few hours I get on a plane to fly to Germany for a week. I guess that gives me at least 8-18 hours over the next 7 days to work distraction free on the plane. I’ve already printed off the worksheets for this week and will attempt to freehand them into my notebook (and then re-type them here).

Week 3 Goals:

Morning Pages x7
Artist Date x1
Detective Work Exercise
Complete as many additional Exercises as possible.

Day 15:

My German adventure in a nutshell so far: “Just hopped a train in the wrong direction. Maybe I should have learned some German before trying this.”

Also my knowledge of German culture summed up right here: “KMFDM comes on shuffle…RIGHT ON! Rammstein comes on shuffle…Skip immediately.”

Today is pretty much my only day to be a dirty rotten tourist. I got in after being awake for 20 hours, an 8 hour plane ride, an hour on a train, and a taxi that ate up half of my walking money and really just wanted to sleep. My one hour nap turned into a three hour nap, and after waking up I really didn’t want to do anything at all. But I forced myself out of the hotel and walked around Cologne all evening.

I’m so happy that I did because I added a few new images to my Patent Pending Self-Guided European Graffiti Walking Tour Image Set. Even though it started off literally heading in the wrong direction.

I’ll get an official blog post up once I return, but for now I’ll share this one:

I was drawn to that “That Guy” sticker, so much so I walked back across the street to grab it.

Day 16:

“Many blocked people are actually very powerful and creative personalities who have been made to feel guilty about their own strengths and gifts. Without being acknowledged, they are often used as batteries by their friends and family who feel free to both use their creative energies and disparage them.

When these blocked artists strive to break free of their dysfunctional systems, they are often urged to be sensible when such advice is not appropriate for them. Made to feel guilty for their talents, they often hide their own light under a bushel for fear of hurting others. Instead, they hurt themselves [...]

When you complete the following phrases, you may feel strong emotion as you retrieve memories and misplaced fragments of yourself. Allow yourself to free-associate for a sentence or so with each phrase.”

— Julia Cameron - The Artist's Way

Detective Work:

My favorite childhood toy was Starscream probably, the transformer. Or maybe Tank Megatron. But if I’m being honest with myself it probably was the stuffed Shamu.
The best movie I saw as a child was Jurassic Park. Full Stop. Dinosaurs Rule.
If it weren’t too late I probably would have partied more in college.
The amount of money I spend on treating myself to entertainment each month is not near as much as I’d like to be spending.
If I weren’t so stingy with my artist I would buy him so many things. Lights, lenses, probably something medium format.
Taking time out for myself is complicated. I put too many people first before me.
I am afraid that if I start dreaming that I will eventually have to wake up.
My parents think artists are a waste of time.
Learning to trust myself is probably easier than I’m making it out to be.
My favorite way to dress is in a nice expensive suit or a nice shirt, but also with a utilikilt somehow.

This was the stuffed Shamu, with her baby. This damn thing didn’t leave my side until I was almost a teenager.

Day 18:
Is there an opposite to jet lag? Jet-future maybe? For whatever reason by body decided to wake up at 5am. But it lead to the following thoughts:

I’m not sure how The Dutch do it. They seem to run on a steady stream of coffee that turns into beer. But I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Also I have to state for the record that its kinda a sucky truth that I feel like I have to beg my friends to shoot with me (and at least even in some minor way compensate me for my talents).

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I mean like, I’m in a decent place in my life and don’t need any extra funds, but it still feels good when someone doesn’t just take advantage and actively wants to pay you for a service you are providing.

Day 20:
Today was the first day I had to skip morning pages. I forgot that it was Saturday and didn’t set an alarm. Thankfully my body woke me up in time. There was a protest in the city today, and it messed up the trains.

I’m back at the hotel now packing and I hope that I can get everything down small enough to make it back home since I had to bring back some extra equipment. As long as the trains are back to normal tomorrow morning all should be well.

Day 21:

Flight back home is delayed about 2 hours. Now would be a great time to work on some exercises. I’m a little doped up on anti-nausea medicine, but I may end up doing some. I’ll probably integrate those into the week 3 blog if that’s the case. Unless the plane has a power outlet.

After the fact note: The flight ended up being delayed a total of 6 hours, and I ended up being awake for 24 straight hours before getting home. This really put a damper on my mood and my pre-work for week 4.

Check In:

How many days did you do your morning pages? If you skipped a day, why did you skip it? 6. One day I woke up extremely late and couldn’t fit it into my schedule.
Did you do your artist date this week? What did you do? How did it feel? Yes. I took a walk through a strange city with my camera and did some shooting of street art, and the remnants of it. I loved it, I always like it when I can walk around and document a new place by myself.
Did you experience any synchronicity this week? What was it? I did actually, but it wasn’t exactly positive. I was so worried about missing my flight back to Atlanta, and it seemed like I was just on the track to do so. But then the flight was massively delayed.
Were there any other issues this week that you consider significant to your recovery? Describe them. I felt that the detective work exercise gave me some insight into my fears as an artist. When I had time to focus on them, it provided some clarity into what may be holding me back.

I wish I had made more time for some of the other exercises this week. I think there were a few that could have been equally unblocking as the detective work. I did take some time for myself to walk around the photo show. Got to play with some new toys in person that I may end up working into my arsenal.

It was nice being across from the “Professional’s Stage” at the show, I found myself listening to and watching some interesting talks that could potentially help me grow my skills…even if many of them were in a language that I couldn’t understand.

Cologne (Köln) Germany - 2018.

The Artist's Way - Week 3